I love to see the memes of Ciara and any of our other favorite couples that read, "whatever her prayer was let me pray that." Truthfully, what is it that women are praying "to get a man?" Does it mean my prayer is incorrect? Does it mean God loves me less? Does that mean I am not praying hard enough because I do not have "it" yet? Do i need to continue to go to more singles conferences to equip me? DO I need to keep going to small groups about how t be a wife? Though some of those are fruitful, ultimately it is about when God wants his will to be manifested at his appointed time.
What I have come to understand from being in a relationship is that
1. It is ALL about God's timing
2. It is ALL about God's purpose
3. It is ALL about God and God's people
4. It is ALL about building one another
5. It is ALL about dying to yourself aily.
Truly, falling in love was THE LEAST of my expectations when I was on Tinder. Ironically, I know a lot of women say, "oh I wasn't even looking and then he showed up." Well, as for me I never stopped searching lol. I believe in every guy I have had an attraction with I had hopes that it would turn into a pursuit. The first thing I always did after meeting a guy was ask God, "Is this my husband," God always said NO!!! Then there were times when I did not een need to ask.
See, after living apart from God for so long, despite my own desires ,I wanted God to direct my plans in everything I because I know God knows what is best for me. Rather than waste time or get out of alignment from my path, I wanted to know God's will upfront.
Ladies, I do not know who lied to us, oh yes The Fall. Nevertheless, do not be afraid to ask men those "tough questions." Hey are you married? Do you like men? Do you know Jesus? What are you looking for? Do you and I share the same convictions?
After the pursuit begins, find out his intentions. Seek God, but also be obedient when God gives you an answer. I previously found myself with a FIRM NO, but I still dabbled in the temptation and I was temporarily hurt. Ladies, why torture yourself with uncertainty? God is not the author of confusion. God did not give us the spirit of fear? If you sense that FLEE from sin. Ladies, wait for an answer to appear after you have invested time and grown to be comfortable with a person? Only to find out they are not looking for a relationship. Ladies, ladies, ladies everyone is ALWAYS looking for a relationship. He is just not that into YOU sis. There is no turning the seeking off. So listen to what a man tells you. Watch how he pursues you. See what he shows you. Most importantly, ASK GOD. Seek God's wisdom. YOu have not because you ask not. Not every guy is "The One" and we should be so thankful God wants us to have his very best.
Nonetheless, moving to Korea I desperately missed black people. So, in the bigger cities I often browsed the app looking for companionship from people who I shared common interests. Initially it was just bored chattering with a handful a guys. Then I met Mac.
Now there are three categories with men they are as follows, Friends/Brother, Get Thee Behind Me Satan, and Lets see where this goes.
Many of the guys I engaged with continued on with just small talk. However, Mac was very consistent in his communication with me. After being on Tinder and seeing there was no fruit there (so much of a distraction). I deleted the app, but not before politely sending him my number. After, all we have been chatting on there for awhile and he seemed interested in speaking with me. After a date or two and realizing I could not see myself without this man I had to seek God like never before for Wisdom, Clarity, Understanding, Below is what I prayed when I wanted to know is Mac "The One."
Help me to seek out a godly centered and driven relationship. Help me to navigate the thoughts that are from you versus the thoughts of the evil one. Help me Lord to seek counsel with you before I moved based off my own decisions so I am not hurt. Help me heal from my brokeness Lord God. Help me to release any doubts and fears I have. Lord help me to overcome any preconceived beliefs about love, marriage, sex, intimacy, family, and most of all myself. Help and empower me Lord to seek your face and not your hand. Help me Lord to be sure, be right, and remain in alignment with your will for my life. REveal to me your plans God and enable me to walk into it in accordance to your will. Father, I do not wish anything more through my relationships than to grow more in love with you, to serve your people, and serve my future spouse and family. Lord strengthened me while I am waiting. Help me to fully understand my purpose as an individual before I began to see purpose through another. Lord as I am seeking companionship help me to be whole so that I do not settle. Help me God to go at your pace and seek your face. You knew your will before I was even formed on this earth. Thus, I thank you for being omniscient knowing that at the right appointed time I will find who it is you have for me. Until then God continue to grow the seed you have planted in me and allow it to flourish. I look forward to your plans manifesting on earth. I am thankful for who you have sent me Lord. I look forward to your will being done at your properly appointed time God.
In Jesus' name, I thank you God Amen.